Wednesday, March 22, 2006
Quarter Moon Crazies
OH, my god! The "crazies" were definitely out tonight. Let me tell you that working in retail can be a trip. Twice I had to save one of my fellow employees from weird, stinky, crazy customers. First, there was "Weird Leprechaun Man." He's a regular at (since I can't name the retail location I work for, we'll call it Corporate Retail Aggrivation Place or C.R.A.P) C.R.A.P and he's just a creepy man. He has pointy ears, is of short stature, wears plaid pants, an old black leather jacket, has a hooked nose, red plastic glasses, and very straight red hair that peaks out from underneath a rimmed hat with those little teethy things all around it (kind of Australian looking. The hat, not the man). WEIRD! Once he starts going he just doesn't stop talking. So I saved my co-worker from him by paging her to another location in the store. Then five minutes to closing Crazy Viggo Lady came in. Now there's a talker! And a stinky, greasy talker. She is completely non-sensical and completely obsessed wtih Viggo Mortensen. She was on a stint for awhile where she would look for every single magazine that had Viggo Mortensen's picture in it and lined them all up and just looked at them. If he has a stalker, I really hope it's not this woman. Of course, there was also the woman on the phone tonight who was comparing the response time to Hurricane Katrina victims to the speed at which our product can be shipped directly to her. Uh....still confumbled about that whole conversation. Not sure how hurricane Katrina victims are related to books. And I'm sure that if a Katrina victim were to hear this bitch, then they too would wonder why she waited until 9 p.m. on a Thursday to inquire about placing an order that she needed by Sunday for a conference of which she knew about BEFORE TONIGHT! At least, when I come home, I know that my dog won't talk back to me. That's a very comforting thought. At least she isn't affected by the sliver of a moon. So all you retail harassers, we aren't sad we lost your business in the first place (I just said that with a smile)!